illusion

it hurts knowing that you were stronger back then than you are now. it kills me to fake my smile and laughter. i know i can never fit in no matter how hard i try. yes, i do have feelings and i care about how people around you react to me. i don't want to run away or avoid anyone due to how important they are to you. i hate being in that situation. I'm sorry but i tried really hard. I'm not really sure what else i could do to make things go better. for the time being, just let me be. just bare with me. everything hurts me. everything could make me cry. so please respect me and i hope you could understand. i love you and i know you do to but unfortunately, there are more out there who despise me. i care and i don't expect you to say anything.

i'm in need

honey, i never loved anyone as much as i do with you. never felt loved by other (man) like how you gave me all this while we've been together. your passion and your affections are hard to believe that i really deserve something like it. this comes straight from my heart and i haven't been stop typing it even for a sec. heikal, i'm lucky to have you. your patience really amazed me as everyone knows how stubborn i could be and how selfish i am most of the time. i'm sorry honey.. i love you and i care for you so much. please keep that in mind now and forever. lovelovelove!